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July 2010

taken from My Utmost for His Highest, as a reminder to myself.

"We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself.

What is my vision of God’s purpose for me? Whatever it may be, His purpose is for me to depend on Him and on His power now. If I can stay calm, faithful, and unconfused while in the middle of the turmoil of life, the goal of the purpose of God is being accomplished in me. God is not working toward a particular finish— His purpose is the process itself. What He desires for me is that I see “Him walking on the sea” with no shore, no success, nor goal in sight, but simply having the absolute certainty that everything is all right because I see “Him walking on the sea” ( Mark 6:49 ). It is the process, not the outcome, that is glorifying to God.

God’s training is for now, not later. His purpose is for this very minute, not for sometime in the future. We have nothing to do with what will follow our obedience, and we are wrong to concern ourselves with it. What people call preparation, God sees as the goal itself.

God’s purpose is to enable me to see that He can walk on the storms of my life right now. If we have a further goal in mind, we are not paying enough attention to the present time. However, if we realize that moment-by-moment obedience is the goal, then each moment as it comes is precious. "

{♥} wash away the miles between us

at 3:13 am

some people are worth staying up for (:

to know that i am missed as much as i miss you guys makes the next 3 months bearable because i know that when we meet, it will be awesome.

at the end of the day, i think it all boils down to this: being able to share what's on my mind freely without editing how i really feel, having fun laughing and enjoying our conversations and talking about random stuff just because you'll get what i'm saying anyway. to know that i have friends/people whom i can just be myself with is, in a single word, heartwarming ♥

{♥} wash away the miles between us

at 1:27 am

back from sydney on monday. ate so much and i've never been happier to be back in my own house and bed, haha. headed up to lake mountain for some snow and tobogganing, was fun...for awhile but it became really tiring and boring after some time, haha. good to get away from the city though (:

i'm enjoying having the days to myself, with nothing to do except sleeping in, planning holidays and trips and watching shows but recently, the nagging voice in my head has been growing louder and louder and i'm starting to feel really bad for slacking my days away and spending the 'rents money instead of looking for a job. i guess some part of me is still in denial and i want this period to last as long as possible but there's no denying the fact that i need to buck up and start earning my feed, like really soon. the 'rents have been great and there's been no pressure in looking for a job but my peers are securing jobs and the pressure's really starting to get to me to be financially independent.

and i guess my future's more than made up for me with the fact that i cant get a visa to stay on here but as usual, now that i don't really have a choice, i kinda wish i could stay on here. it's not to say that life back home wouldn't be good, especially since both old and new friends will be there and there's the added bonus of seeing family frequently but i've gotten used to living life independently here and this will be sorely missed when i get back home. oh well, new chapter, new experience, it's time to embrace the changes instead of whining about them.

because above all else, i know one thing remains constant, You. You're more than enough for me (:

{♥} wash away the miles between us

at 11:35 pm

"There is nothing like returning to a place unchanged to find out the ways in which you have changed"

It is astounding to see how true this statement is and to realise that sometimes you just need to stop awhile and reflect inwards to see how much you have grown without you realising. I went for dinner with uncle J tonight and everything was the same as it was 3 years ago but this time round, I was amazed at how easily the conversation flowed even though it was just the 3 of us. I realised that I've grown so much now, that I find it easier to mingle with people even if they are not my age or from my social circle and that I can hold my own in conversations.

At the same time, I realised that time has indeed flown by so quickly and even though it seems sometimes that we just take one day at a time, when you look back, you'll be amazed at how 3 years can feel like it just happened a moment ago. I was very much aware of how everyone's growing up and growing old, that people you take for granted that will always be there will one day be gone too. I'll be lying if I said I live for the moment and I'm not bothered about what will happen in the years to come. I guess at the back of my mind, there's this constant thought that time is running out for us and one day, I will have to relieve that awful moment when that phone call came but I pray that God will keep the people I love safe and healthy, at least for many more years to come.

World cup season is ending soon and it is yet another reminder that 4 years have passed and that I'll be TWENTY-SEVEN the next time world cup comes round. The last 4 years have been wonderful albeit challenging because I've experienced so much and met so many different people but I believe the next 4 years are going to be even better because it's going to be a new season in my life. I'm praying and believing for the start of many revelations to come and I'm looking forward to discovering what God has in store for me.

The hope of all hearts is You, Your love never fails (:

{♥} wash away the miles between us

at 12:19 am